


Imagination Exploration

by Miranda_tries_their_best



Series: Shades of Depression [3]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: A small dark moment where Depression want's to destroy things that are happier then him, Depression, He just has feathers no wings, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda, Return of Dadceit, Self-Worth Issues, This fic goes from like a 2 to 10 and then back down to 0 really fast, Wing Grooming, but he doesn't it's okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:54:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22166701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miranda_tries_their_best/pseuds/Miranda_tries_their_best
Summary: Depression really loves the imagination, it always sang of a more beautiful world with adventure and a hero that always won. It's an amazing place full of dreams and wonder and even now, while there's foreboding fog all around him that mutes the colors around him with gray, he loves it and-And the dark side wasn't really supposed to be on this side of it.
Series: Shades of Depression [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1573210
Comments: 7
Kudos: 32





	Imagination Exploration

**Author's Note:**

> Kay, some Warnings: Mentions of bugs and that weird tentacle monster from sims medieval, some overstimulation, Some destructive intentions, poorly groomed feathers
> 
> (The overstimulation is how I experience it sometimes and I don't have it as bad as some people do so like take what you read with a grain of salt)

Depression really loves the imagination, it always sang of a more beautiful world with adventure and a hero that always won. It's an amazing place full of dreams and wonder and even now, while there's foreboding fog all around him that mutes the colors around him with gray, he loves it and-

And the dark side wasn't really supposed to be on this side of it. Sure, Remus occasionally didn't mind Depression coming into his side as long as the raven promised to not touch anything (which is sort of hard to do when everything is normally trying to maim him in some way) but light Creativity's side? That's off-limits, the prince barely stands his presence let alone risks Depression ruining his inspiration.

But today Depression is quiet, he sneaks past Deceit's careful eye(or maybe the liar just let him think he did, it's hard to tell nowadays) and heads into Remus's room. Thankfully the other dark side isn't there so the teal side doesn't have to deal with that level of energy just yet.

Getting through the dark half of the imagination was easy when Remus wasn't around to either target him or give him shit about destroying his creations. So after swatting a few bugs that try to burrow under his skin out of existence and carefully watching his step(he still shudders at the time he accidentally fell into a hole with the weird pit beast from Sims Medieval, Remus cackling above him as the creature took a fancy to the feathered side.) He manages to make it through the giant wall of thorn that separates the imagination into half.

It's instantly brighter, even with the fog. It's humid and raining lightly but the raven presses forward in awe and a little caution. Depression knows he can't touch anything or move it out of place, if something attacks him he'll probably just have to take it because the dark side isn't much for running but destroying one of the Prince's creations could lead to another creative block.

The forest felt mystical, the fog only added the effect as fireflies occasionally blinked. It's peaceful, it's fake but lovely and it only draws the depressive side in deeper.

Until he stumbles out of the forest, fog pours from between the trees but dissipates before flowing to fair past the treeline. The dark side smiles softly, waving a hand through the mist and watching it dance around his fingers with no fear of something emerging from it Silent Hill style.

Depression soon leaves the forest behind him, curious to see how deep into the light side's imagination before he either gets caught or loses interest. The feathered side honestly hopes it's the former, as bad as it felt being kicked out he would feel terrible later for leaving too early.

But for now, he wonders, walks along trampled down roads, gazes longingly as cute animals and beautiful flowers. The teal never touches though, he's not here to ruin anything with his presence today.

At some point, he stumbles upon a village, on the edge of another forest that wasn't clouded in fog and magic. Lord, does Depression know that he shouldn't go in but there's music and friendly voices carrying on the wind and the dark side certainly didn't get here by practicing self-restraint. The village is too inviting, Depression is just pathetic enough to actually sort of crave interaction between something that isn't actually real, he'll probably still feel bad when he does something wrong but at least it's not like he's going to ruin the life of a glorified NPC.

But perhaps the raven is a bit overzealous, not as much of a rare thing as one would assume, sliding his way past the gates of the village and suddenly remembering a fun little disappointing fact.

He doesn't know how to talk to people without bothering them.

His throat feels tight as he grips the sides of his jacket. It really shouldn't be this hard, these things were literally just made to fill up space and interact with Creativity if he came by, it should be as easy as just walking up to someone and saying "Hello!" But Depression hesitates, instead of filtering off closer to the building to stay out of the way.

He's anxious but that anxiety melts into something sad and heavy in his stomach. Why did he even bother coming here? He shouldn't have even tried, should have stayed in his room or pace the halls until Deceit got sick of him wondering and sent him back to bed. The dark side looks out at the bustling crowd of people going about their routine and feels like Icarus. He's gotten so close to the sun, could reach out and touch its beauty but instead, his wings fail as he plummets down into dark waters below.

The little taste of hope hurts more than just the normal rejection because right now, he has no one to blame but himself for his loneliness.

The townsfolk continue to move about, complete ignorance of his existence. Depression looks on as something bitter raises up inside him, twisting and dark under his skin. He hears laughter, singing, there are people smiling and talking amongst themselves while he suffers in his self-imposed darkness. His hands ache as he presses them to his eyes, trying to hold back tears.

_It's not fair._ He can feel bubbling energy under his skin. _I don't want to see it anymore._ Dark eyes gaze out on the streets. The stone under his feet feels less present, flickering on the edge of existence. _Get rid of it._

Smiles, laughter, songs, the lull of conversation. He wants it gone, he wants to ruin it, destroy it but just as he raises his hand-

Dark, crackling with a restless energy he hates and ready to direct that hate at the imagination.

A hand grabs his wrist, tugging him to the side. "What do you think you're doing?!" Depression meets the furious gaze of the Prince, he also has a sword to the teal side's throat but that comes second to the storm blazing behind the Prince's eyes.

The energy doesn't go away, it crawls under his skin and bites at his wrist where the light side still grips him but Depression's shoulders slump as the enmity fades from his system. It leaves him numb and exhausted despite how his skin still felt like it was buzzing.

"Oh..." Depression is faced with a harsh reminder of why he's not allowed here. The once stone road beneath his feet is gone, the weeds growing between cracks have vanished, everything two feet around him have fades into a blank gray.

"'Oh?' That's it? Nothing to say for yourself?! I don't know where you get off coming into my kingdom and ruining my creations but- Ugh! How'd you even get in here?!" The prince raves, waving his sword around but at least let's go of the teal side to gesture. Only growing more frustrated when Depression remained silent. "I'd throw you in the dungeons if I knew you wouldn't just erase those too! This is why we can't have nice things!" The Prince huffs.

It's probably useless but the teal side still mumbles a quiet. "I'm sorry."

"...What."

The prince stares him down, making Depression sink in on himself to hide in the feathered collar of his coat. "I'm sorry." He repeats. "I didn't- I didn't come here to try anything, I just-" His words wobbled as he fought a losing battle against his tears. _"I j_ _ **ust wanted- Fuck, w**_ _hy-_ _ **why am I li**_ _ke_ _this?"_ His voice distorts and skips, making him cover his mouth as tears flow down his cheeks.

"Oh uh- Hey, no. Depression, it's... Well, it's not okay you could of really hurt Thomas but- Hey, wait!" The prince calls out after him but it's too late, the dark side sinks out of the imagination and pops back up in his own room.

He wants to scream but bites his tongue. The walls are leaking and the ceiling is dripping with inky black water, a physical manifestation of his distress. He wants to smash the walls, punch holes to let more of the dark liquid flow through until it fills his room until is drowns him in his sorrow and regrets. At least then the pain would be physical, something solid instead of the ache that radiates through his body simply because his brain is too stupid to realize that he's not actually hurt. So he just has to deal with it, with the ache, with his skin feeling too tight and wrong and it's just-

It's too much.

The dark side struggles with his jacket, throwing it across the room as he sinks down onto the floor, his arms being free is a slight relief to the overwhelming sensation. His breath comes out hitched or in sobs as he curls over on himself, feeling like he's trying to contain an explosion and honestly, maybe he is. He's so caught up in his misery that the teal side barely registers his door opening until a foot nudges his leg, the rough contact making his fingers twitch and clench in fists.

"Jesus, Depy. What you do to get Roman in a tizzy?" Depression flinches at the mention of the creative sides name as the orange side crouches down beside him, Callus looking upon his pathetic self with that stupid grin. "Should have heard how Deceit had to suck up to keep him out of our space, it was almost cute."

Depression only replies with a whine. Deceit's going to be so mad, Depression didn't just sneak into the imagination, he erased a piece of it and invoked Creativity's wrath. The Prince has never cared enough to actually storm down into the dark before though, he doesn't want to think of how disappointed the yellow side will be. Especially after Deceit told him that the teal side could go to him if he felt restless.

"Ugh, seriously. You're dripping everywhere. If any of this shit stains-"

"When I told you to leave, August, I did not mean go harass Depression. Out, now." Deceit's voice cuts through the air like a knife, successfully making Callus shut up.

"Uh oh, dad's here." The orange side teases before standing up once more, only shrugging at Deceit's glare as he left the room, slamming the door far too hard behind him.

Depression had already curled in on himself but now he just wishes he could sink through the floor, his arms wrapped around the back of his head as he kept crouched forward. He doesn't think he can handle this right now, couldn't Deceit see he was already on the edge? How is he supposed to take this?

The teal side flinches as a gloved hand touches his back, stroking over the dark feathers that grew just below the depressive side's shoulder blades. The dark side always wore shirts with a cut out back as his feathers would sometimes get caught in the cheap fabric he usually wore. They never got stuck in the leather of his jacket though but said jacket was thrown across the room, leaving him exposed. It's a gross feeling at first but the liar brushes his fingers through the shorter feathers along his spine so gently, soothing them even as a few fall out with the gentle pulling. It's teetering on the of too much but the snake keeps his touches light until the teal side's body decides that this touch isn't as horrible as he initially assumed.

When was the last time Depression groomed his feathers? Having them be ruffled like this aches in a relieving sort of way as pin feathers are soothed down instead of just sticking up everywhere. The teal side has little choice but to relax, the repetitive motions ground him as Deceit allows his petting to get a little firmer now that the raven side has calmed.

"There we go." Deceit finally breaks his silence. "Deep breaths, Nevermore."

Depression only nods, taking a shaky breath, allowing himself a moment to calm before sitting up slightly and letting his arms drop from his head. "You... You're not upset?" He questions hesitantly, not eager to break the peace but dreading to draw it out.

The snake just raises his brow. "I'm impressed, actually." And smirks as the teal side sighs when gloved nails scratch under his longer feathers. "You haven't been able to sneak past me since we were kids. I must say, I'm curious about how you got to the other side without help though."

Depression lets himself give the smallest smile. "If I told you, you'd have a plan to stop me next time." The depressive side's body still trembled slightly, still recovering from his episode but even so-

"Already planning another escape from me? I'm wounded, truly." -This is a good moment. Depression isn't sure if it's endorphins from crying so much or because Deceit didn't have that uncomfortable look the liar gets when he usually has to corral the depressed side back to his room. "You know I'll just find out on my own, Depression. I see all."

"Didn't see me leave." The Raven mumbled only to jump with a gasp as the liar had lightly tugged on his feathers.

"Don't get cheeky with me now, little crow." The snake shifts to sit behind the other dark side on the floor, pulling loose feathers and soothing over Depression's back when the feathered side flinches. "It's a good thing you don't have actual wings, what did I tell you about taking care of your feathers?" He chastises.

"Is the prince- Nnh!" Depression keens as the other dark side scratch at the spot between his shoulder blades, successfully cutting off the teal side's question.

"One thing at a time, we can worry about that after we've fixed up your feathers."

Needless to say, Depression was barely awake by the time the other dark side was done, successfully distracted from his thoughts for the time being.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how this got so long but i'm not gonna complain because surprisingly writing what you wanna write makes you write more who fucking knew


End file.
